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Troy therapist provides insight on combating holiday loneliness and beyond

Troy Times | Published December 18, 2024

TROY — Carrie Krawiec, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with the Birmingham Maple Clinic in Troy, has provided information for those who could be struggling with isolation during this upcoming holiday season.

Krawiec specializes in couples counseling, family issues, parenting problems, postpartum depression and menopause, pregnancy, fertility problems, relationship problems, and stress.

Through Krawiec’s research, she has noted that though most people are constantly connected to one another, either through their personal, professional or online affiliations, feelings of isolation can still be present.

“Though new research suggests Americans are returning to pre-pandemic levels of loneliness and isolation, our baseline for this statistic before COVID-19 was abysmal at best,” Krawiec said in a press release. “Recent research suggests that anywhere from one in five to one in three people report feelings of loneliness or social isolation which puts people at higher risk for physical health issues such as sleep disorders, high blood pressure, heart disease, mental health issues and addiction.

“There are multiple contributors to social isolation as a person ages — like no longer routinely working or driving, loss of spouse or other close family, not wanting to burden children or grandchildren, not being proficient on devices or social media, and more,” Krawiec added. “While aging increases the risk for feelings of loneliness and social isolation, a recent study by AARP found that 18–34-year-olds are most likely to report feeling lonely. Young people feeling lonely despite likely having active, busy lives highlights the fact that often loneliness and social isolation aren’t a problem of not experiencing enough people, but rather a problem of not experiencing enough connection.”

During the holiday season, these issues with isolation can persist among others.

“I think it’s busy year-round for a variety of reasons. ... The business during the winter months probably is more intense,” Lori Edelson, an accredited psychotherapist and owner of Birmingham Maple Clinic said. 

“There are a variety of reasons for that and holidays, certainly one of them, is the time when people are much more aware of their own emotional state,” Edelson said.

“You know loneliness can occur with people who are surrounded by people because it’s sort of an internal state of mind, as well as people who are isolated and around family. But there are a lot of reasons why holiday time is, for sure, a more intense time for us to be available for our patients and for patients reaching out for help because there is so much stress around wanting to be with family, and then being with family, that triggers many historic conflicts that are sometimes able to be distracted during the year,” Edelson added. “(There is) a lot of loneliness around missing family members who have either passed away or are not able to celebrate with the family. (There are) many, many reasons why: Right now, we’re finding that during the holidays, loneliness seems most acute, but really it’s becoming more of a national phenomenon now throughout the year.”

Some people may not be inclined to seek out professional help due to the busyness of the season or financial concerns, specifically in terms of clients not wanting to use all their deductibles. 

“So personally, my assessment of my therapy life has been that December is probably the month where I see the fewest patients, and it’s not because they don’t have the need, but it’s probably because they’re overcommitted financially and timewise in so many other areas of their life,” Krawiec said. “Certainly, my personal experience is that, although people are probably very stressed and on edge, they’re not necessarily making the time to come in.”

To remedy these issues, Krawiec suggests that people consider developing deeper connections with themselves as a way to further enhance their connections with other people and experiences.

“Self-acceptance, self-awareness, and a desire for self-improvement are advantageous in reducing feelings of loneliness and social isolation,” Krawiec said in a press release. “A trained mental health therapist can be beneficial to helping you explore the interests that bring you fulfillment and joy, the features of relationships that are most meaningful to you, and how to allow yourself to be vulnerable and persistent if at first you do not succeed.” 

Some steps to help with this process include:

• Journaling can help organize thoughts, feelings and needs and can help people better understand their patterns and interests and what activities they are most drawn to.

• People may explore what friendships and relationships mean to them by exploring and evaluating what kind of friend or relationship participant they are and considering what they are looking for others to reciprocate. “A therapist can be useful in modeling adaptive listening skills, practicing communication where you feel most vulnerable, and coping with social anxiety,” Krawiec said in a press release.

• They can find hobbies that they enjoy doing, regardless of where they are at in terms of skill level for each respective hobby. “Whether you love cycling or doing yoga or crocheting, there will always be people at a range of skill levels and time investments, so do not assume you do not belong because you are less talented or committed than others,” Krawiec said in a press release. “Consider that some people like to share their wisdom and advice and may be glad to take on a new apprentice or to talk about a topic that you share an interest in.”

• Consider letting go of regrets and resentments as these feelings can hinder meaningful connections. Sometimes talking about these feelings out loud, even to a therapist, provides relief.

• People should also understand that failing is part of the learning process. “You may reach out to a friend or start a new group, and it may not work out,” Krawiec said in a press release. “That’s okay! Even a first try at therapy may feel like a letdown but know that it’s OK to shop around. When it comes to therapy, research shows that the best predictor of success is a ‘good fit.’” 

For more information, visit www.birminghammaple.com.